Advice

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The Wisdom of the Rooms“We couldn’t help ourselves,
but we could help each other.”

~by Michael Z

So many family members who call Changing Lives Foundation
feel like they are all alone in their struggles.
Our best advice to those who have limited resources is
to visit an Open AA meeting or two, attend an Al-Anon or Nar-Anon meeting.
There,they will find others with similar concerns.
Many of the people in these meetings offer gems of wisdom just like this
from Michael Z.
Read what he has to say about helping others, the power of God and ultimately, helping yourself—


Before recovery I did everything I could think of to get better on my own. I’d try to stop drinking during the week; then on Mondays through Thursdays. I’d join a gym and exercise a while, or I’d go on a healthy diet. I went into therapy to work on myself, and I started journaling. At the end of all of this, though, I’d find myself alone, depressed and drunk.

When I entered the program, I thought I might finally learn how to help myself. Instead, I was given direction that made no sense. “Wash the coffee cups after the meeting,” I was told. “Get a commitment to get to a meeting early and set the chairs up.” “Become a greeter and ask other people how they are doing.” What about me? I thought. How am I going to get better if I’m focused on helping others rather than myself? Even though I didn’t understand it, I was desperate, so I followed your direction.

And that’s when the miracle took place. Over time I came to see that alone I couldn’t, but together we could recover. I learned that the solution began when I got out of myself and helped you. That when two alcoholics got together, that’s when the power of God flowed and healed us both. Ultimately I learned that when I was helping you, you were helping me and that was the solution I could never find by myself.

Today I know that while I can’t help myself, I can always help you – and together, we can help each other.

 

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Excerpted from “The Wisdom of the Rooms Volume 2″
~by Michael Z.

 

The Wisdom of the Rooms Volume 2Order Your Signed Copies Today!

Click Here
to Purchase

This makes a Great Gift for yourself and others you know in and out of recovery.

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Return from “We found we couldn’t help ourselves, but we could help each other.”
to Visit “Why Don’t They Just Quit?” Home

More from Wisdom of the Rooms:
Things might not get better for me, but I can get better despite things
12 Step AA Wisdom: Bring the body, the mind will follow

Related:
The AA Promises

Have you “tried everything?” To learn about Affordable Phone Counseling with Joe Herzanek click here.
•More info and testimonials click here
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couldn’t help ourselves couldn’t help ourselves couldn’t help ourselves

 

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The Wisdom of the Rooms“Criticism: Advice That is Not Asked For”

~by Michael Z

So many family members who call Changing Lives Foundation
feel like they are all alone in their struggles.
Our best advice to those who have limited resources is
to visit an Open AA meeting or two, attend an Al-Anon or Nar-Anon meeting.
There,they will find others with similar concerns.
Many of the people in these meetings offer gems of wisdom just like this
from Michael Z.
Read what he has to say about criticism, advice and AA—



I have someone in my life that, after she asks how I’m doing and I begin to tell her, immediately begins telling me the things I need to change or start doing. Until this quote I didn’t realize that the reason her unasked for advice made me feel so bad was because it was thinly veiled criticism of the way I was living my life.

Thank God the program doesn’t work that way. If people in the program or my sponsor started giving me unasked for advice or telling me what to do, I would have left long ago. Instead, people give me suggestions (when I ask for them) based on their own experience. If they had a similar situation as mine and they did something that worked for them, then they may suggest that it might work for me as well. It’s up to me at that point to try it or not.

Because of the AA program, I have learned to apply this wisdom in my other relationships as well. In fact, people now call me a good listener, and it’s because I know that all people really want is to be heard and understood. If asked, the best I can do is share my experience with a similar situation – if I have it. Otherwise, it’s best to listen, empathize and help them process their experience.

That’s always better than giving advice that’s not asked for.

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Excerpted from “The Wisdom of the Rooms Volume 2″
~by Michael Z.

 

The Wisdom of the Rooms Volume 2Order Your Signed Copies Today!

Click Here
to Purchase

This makes a Great Gift for yourself and others you know in and out of recovery.

Subscribe to Quote of the Week

 

 

To go from “Criticism: Advice that is not asked for”
to Visit “Why Don’t They Just Quit?” Home

More from Wisdom of the Rooms:
Things might not get better for me, but I can get better despite things
12 Step AA Wisdom: Bring the body, the mind will follow

Related:
The AA Promises

Have you “tried everything?” To learn about Affordable Phone Counseling with Joe Herzanek click here.
•More info and testimonials click here

____________________________________________________________

Criticism Advice AA

 

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