February 2012

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Resource Links for Families of Substance Abusers, Addicts and Alcoholics

Addiction Resources Helping HandsWe’ve listed our favorite, most informative, useful, reliable—and yes, even the most “fun” websites we could find,
to help you navigate this challenging world of recovery.

Changing Lives Foundation Logo
Updated 5.30.13
This Resource List is a work-in-progress. If you’re seeking a particular resource and still need help, please email us: ChangingLivesFoundation@gmail.com.

 

PHONE COUNSELING FOR FAMILIES:
Joe Herzanek/Changing Lives Foundation (author, Why Don’t They Just Quit?, addiction counselor) Drug Addiction Phone Counseling for family members—providing substance abuse counseling to families in crisis (provided on a very limited basis).

Toby Drews (author Getting Them Sober, family counselor) Long distance telephone consultations (including evenings, weekends and holidays) concerning the addiction and/or family issues, with individuals or couples, or alcoholics who want to seriously look at getting sober–or who are already in recovery, and want additional help.


*TREATMENT CENTERS:
NEW!
FREE ADDICTION TREATMENT
Drug Treatment for Patients with No Money  A guide about finding treatment, free of cost. Don’t let a lack of money stop you from getting the professional help you need. Instead, consider all your options including free drug treatment through a rehab scholarship.

LOW COST, NO COST ALCOHOL AND DRUG TREATMENT RESOURCE LIST
Low Cost, No Cost Treatment
Our most extensive list of low/no cost treatment, sober living facilities, halfway homes, family resources and more.

MULTIPLE LOCATIONS
Valley Hope Association A nationally-recognized, nonprofit organization dedicated to providing quality chemical dependency treatment services at an affordable price.

COLORADO
Arapahoe House
(13 locations in Colorado) provides life-changing alcohol and drug rehabilitation at 13 locations in Denver, Colorado for vulnerable individuals and families. Arapahoe House is Colorado’s leading nonprofit provider of affordable drug and alcohol treatment and behavioral health services.  We provide substance abuse illness treatment for women and their children, teens, adults and families.

CeDAR Center for Dependency, Addiction and Rehabilitation. A comprehensive addiction treatment center offering quality 12-step residential treatment and support programs crucial to recovery for addictions to alcohol, drug and co-occurring addictions such as gambling.

Harmony Foundation Alcoholism Drug Addiction Treatment Center – Estes Park Colorado. Outpatient & Intervention services available.

Centennial Peaks Hospital A recognized center of excellence and preferred treatment provider for inpatient and intensive outpatient health care in Colorado and surrounding states.

Highlands Behavioral Health System An 86 bed freestanding behavioral health hospital offering psychiatric care for adults and adolescents. Mental health level of care assessments are provided free of charge. Once a patient is admitted to Highlands Behavioral Health System, an interdisciplinary team creates an individualized treatment program that includes acute care treatment, solution-focused treatment, and comprehensive discharge planning.

NEW!
(Colorado) Teens:

Fire Mountain Programs For teens age 12-18, Sober Home, a teenage substance abuse and dual diagnosis residential treatment center, located in the mountains outside Boulder, CO.

(Colorado) Men:
Jaywalker Lodge Provides relapse treatment and transitional living programs for adult men seeking freedom from drug and alcohol addiction in the Rocky Mountains of Colorado. Jaywalker programs are designed for clients with a history of previous treatments and/or failed attempts at sobriety.

(Colorado) Women:
The Haven An 89-bed Modified Therapeutic Community (MTC) located in Denver, Colorado for women, mothers and their infants. Provides intensive residential substance abuse treatment to women who are either pregnant or have an infant in their care.

The Rose House An extended care, residential addiction treatment program for women. In our 16 bed, luxury facility, we provide intensive therapy, relapse prevention and facilitate the development of life skills necessary to maintain long term sobriety.

(Colorado) Outpatient:
Freedom Center
Freedom Center is an outpatient program working with men and women to help them replace addictive practices with self-mastery so that dependency is transformed into empowerment.

CALIFORNIA
New Life Community Services New Life Community Services provides inpatient and outpatient drug & alcohol treatment, emergency shelter for families with children, and counseling services.

Promises Treatment Centers Promises offers highly individualized treatment to clients struggling with addictions and co-occurring disorders. Located in Malibu and West Los Angeles, Promises offers 12-step based programs from Detoxification, Primary Residential/Inpatient treatment, Extended Care, Sober Living, and Outpatient services in a small intimate setting.

Betty Ford Center We provide effective alcohol and other drug dependency treatment services, including programs of education and research, to help women, men and families begin the process of recovery. We emphasize involving the entire family in the recovery process, and we stress the importance of each person identifying his or her own spiritual path.

Cliffside Malibu For effective Drug Rehabilitation, a luxurious and private drug treatment center. . .the choice of leading professionals.

FLORIDA
Transitions Recovery Program in North Miami Beach Florida has the staff with the training and years of experience to create a relaxing and enjoyable atmosphere to reclaim your life from substance abuse.

ILLINOIS
Rosecrance Treatment Centers Rosecrance is dedicated to providing the highest quality care and the best evidence-based practices to treat substance use disorder and mental health issues. We’re focused on one thing: Providing the best opportunity for lasting recovery. Life’s waiting.

NEVADA
Las Vegas Recovery Center World renowned, medically managed withdrawal, multi-addiction, dual diagnosis, and residential treatment center for substance abuse disorders and chronic pain rehabilitation.

PENNSYLVANIA
St. Joseph Institute Offering a superior approach to treatment for addiction. Personalizing alcohol & drug abuse rehab in PA with individualized programs in a tranquil atmosphere.

Teens:
Clear Brook Lodge Established specifically for adolescents, this 46-bed inpatient rehabilitation center is the beginning of what must be a continued effort to maintain a lifestyle and lifetime of sobriety.

TEXAS
Heartlight Ministries
Heartlight is a year-round therapeutic boarding school that helps troubled teens begin living a more fulfilling and less self-destructive lifestyle.

UTAH
Le Mont Michel
An upscale sober home nestled at the bast of Utah’s majestic Wasatch Mountains, utilizing Applied Recovery—a systematic and comprehensive approach to planning out the first year of sobriety for people recovering from drug and alcohol addictions.

*The list of organizations, professionals, and advisors (referred to hereafter as “advisors”) is provided solely for informational purposes. Changing Lives Foundation does not endorse, and has not undertaken any independent investigation of the qualifications, credentials, experience, education, training, or proper licensing of, any advisor listed below. Changing Lives Foundation does not have any direct or indirect input in any advice or services provided by any advisor listed on this website.

Any person using contact information provided herein, to locate and select an advisor is strongly encouraged to inquire about the advisor’s professional expertise, experience, licensing, and qualifications before engaging or hiring such a person or organization.

NEW!
SUICIDE PREVENTION:

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline Helps individuals in suicidal crisis to contact the nearest available suicide prevention and mental health service provider through a toll-free phone number (features options for deaf and hard of hearing).

RECOVERY COMMUNITIES:
Trilogy Recovery Community (Walla Walla, WA)
Trilogy Recovery Community is a grassroots collaboration of parents, youth, concerned citizens, and community leaders who believe that all children deserve to live in a drug-free community.

RECOVERY COACHING:
Living Sober Life Coaching Shira Goldberg is a life and recovery coach with both personal and professional knowledge who supports and encourages clients to achieve their life goals within the context of long-term recovery. Shira helps every individual access recovery and sobriety.

RESOURCES FOR CHILDREN:
Betty Ford Children’s Program (Multiple locations) Did you know that the Betty Ford Center offers treatment for the children of the patient? Learn about the Betty Ford Center children’s program.

INTERVENTION:
Love First Jeff and Debra Jay have assembled a team of clinical interventionists experienced in the treatment of alcoholism, drug addiction and other issues–providing expert direction and planning for every aspect of the intervention. Love First will fully rehearse your team, lead the intervention and will also safely escort your loved one to treatment.

Love First (Book) The best book on intervention for families by professional interventionists, Jeff and Debra Jay, published by Hazelden Books. Changing Lives recommends this book to all our counseling and intervention clients.

(A-I-R) Assistance in Recovery “America’s leader in intervention and recovery services.”

ARISE Intervention A three-phase process which is a Continuum of Care that leads your loved one into appropriate treatment and recovery. The addicted individual is invited to join the process right from the beginning with no surprises, no secrets, no coercion and absolute respect and love.

NEW!
BOOKS and DVDs:
Why Don’t They Just Quit? What families and friends need to know about addiction and recovery
(also available on Kindle and Barnes & Noble’s Nook). Audio MP3 CD and Audio Download available on Amazon.com

Recommended Books and DVDs for families of drug and alcohol abusers and addicts

ADDICTION HELP:
Changing Lives Foundation An informative site providing help for friends and family of addicts/alcoholics—with a focus on how individuals and families recover from these problems. “Addicts and alcoholics aren’t crazy and they CAN quit!”

SoberNation The #1 National Recovery Resources and Addiction Treatment Centers Database on the internet.

addiction2recovery addiction2recovery™ exists to help change the lives of people impacted by addiction. addiction2recovery is a unique recovery organization because our focus is on outreach. We reach out to people in all stages of addiction discovery and recovery. Our goal is to help strengthen and empower individuals in recovery.

The Institute for Addiction Study We want to challenge current thinking about addiction in order to inform individuals, groups and families of the current controversies within addiction treatment so they can make informed decisions about recovery.

Drug Addiction Support News and current topics about drug addiction—including the latest books and DVD’s for Addiction Recovery, along with resources to learn how to help your family deal with drugs.

Sober.com Committed to helping the addicted and families affected by drug abuse and drug addiction—to find rehabs, especially troubled teens. This site also includes various interesting venues for recovering people to connect with each other.

The Association for Addiction Professionals A professional membership organization that serves counselors who specialize in addiction treatment.

Hazelden A comprehensive site for individuals, families, and communities struggling with addiction to alcohol and other drugs. This nonprofit organization helps people transform their lives by providing the highest quality treatment and continuing care services, education, research, and publishing products available today.

COUNSELING/LONDON, UK:
Mark Dempster Counselling
Help with any form of chemical or behavioural addiction (Alcohol and/or Drugs, Gambling, Sex and Love) or working through Depression and Anxiety, Loss and Bereavement, Relationship and Couples Counselling. Call for free confidential conversation.

FAMILY SUPPORT:
NEW!
Jail and Prison Re-entry Guide (Colorado) Getting On After Getting Out: A Re-entry Guide for Colorado. This 200 page book provides extensive information about preparing for release while incarcerated and re-entering society after release.

Al-Anon/Alateen (which includes Alateen for younger members) offers hope and help to families and friends of alcoholics.

Nar-Anon (which includes Narateen for younger members) family groups are a worldwide fellowship for those affected by someone else’s addiction.

Online Nar-Anon Outreach Online forum that provides opportunities to chat and attend online meetings over the internet (24/7).

Palmer Drug Abuse Program (PDAP) (Multiple Locations) FREE recovery services for substance abuse and drug addiction. A 12 step, faith-based program that offers group meetings, individual and family counseling to families, siblings and teens. One of the best resources (for the entire family) we have found.

Getting Them Sober One of the best websites, counseling resource and book series on recovery we have found.

Parents. The Anti-Drug Extensive amount of info, advice, resources specifically written for parents.

Online Al-Anon Outreach Information about online Al-Anon Family Groups and links to meetings on the Internet.

Love and Logic Helpful articles, simple and practical techniques to help parents and teachers have less stress and more fun while raising responsible kids.

Family Therapy in Drug Rehab a family component to addiction treatment that allows healing for the family to begin (this link is just one example of many similar programs).

ADDICTION PROFESSIONAL TRAINING:
Odyssey Training Center (Denver, CO Springs, Grand Junction CO)
The leader in providing substance abuse training to Substance Abuse Counselors and Mental Health Professionals. With training facilities in Denver, Colorado Springs and Grand Junction, as well as Online courses, Odyssey provides a wide range of workshops focusing on substance abuse and related mental health and domestic violence issues.

TWELVE-STEP:
Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) A fellowship of men and women who share their experience, strength, and hope with each other so that they may solve their common problem and help others to recover from alcoholism (on the “Is AA for you?” page there are 12 questions to help you decide if you have a problem).

AA Grapevine Voice of Alcoholics Anonymous, The International Journal of AA, articles, stories, jokes, letters, subscriptions since 1944.

12-Step.org. Information and tools for working the 12-step program.

Read the AA Big Book online Complete text of “Alcoholics Anonymous” also known as “The Big Book” is available in English, French, and Spanish.

Using Al-Anon’s Steps in Our Personal Lives This series of podcasts discusses how Al-Anon’s Twelve Steps have helped people successfully handle a variety of challenges associated with the family illness of alcoholism.

AA Intergroup AA Telephone Numbers, USA.

Marijuana Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share our experience, strength, and hope with each other that we may solve our common problem and help others to recover from marijuana addiction.

SOBER LIVING:
Sober Living Outpatient (Delray Beach, FL) Sober Living Outpatient is more than a treatment center; it is a magical place whereby clients and staff work in concert to assist the clients in their goal of living a fulfilled and peaceful life without the need for mood altering substances.

New Life House (Los Angeles, CA) Sober Living for teens, young adults and adults. Each New Life House sober living is 12 Step-based and works through positive peer interaction, 24/7 support and a huge network of fellow sober men who have achieved long term sobriety.

Oxford House Democratically run, self-supporting, and drug free group home. A national directory of all the houses is provided. Self Run, Self Supported, Addiction Recovery Houses

Serenity Houses Affordable, very nice 12-step-based Sober Living Homes in Colorado. The Serenity Houses provide a structured living environment for people with alcohol or drug dependency problems.

CO-ADDICTION:
Soaring Above Co-Addiction —a book, blog and website dedicated to helping the co-addicted rise above their situation to take control of their own life.

CHRISTIAN RECOVERY:
addiction2recovery reality.connection.change. Addiction recovery materials along with gripping videos of real people’s stories of change and recovery.

Christians in Recovery Over 3000 Pages of help for recovery from life circumstances, self defeating behaviors and addictions. Unlimited Chat, live help, free magazine and more.

Celebrate Recovery A Christ-centered program ministering to those who struggle with hurts, hang-ups, habits or addictions.

ALCOHOL/DRUGS INFO:
NEW!
AllTreatment A drug rehab center directory and substance abuse information resource dedicated to educating our users about drug and alcohol addiction. Features a complete directory of drug addiction treatment centers and much more.

NEW!
Drug Dangers DrugDangers.com delivers the latest breaking news and information on the FDA Warnings, drug side effects, recalls and lawsuits.

DrugAlert.org A comprehensive database featuring information and news alerts about potentially dangerous drugs currently on the market or previously available worldwide.

National Institute on Drug Abuse NIDA’s mission is to lead the nation in bringing the power of science to bear on drug abuse and addiction.

The Drug Guide at The Partnership at Drugfree.org is a comprehensive and up-to-date source of drug information, including drug descriptions, slang terms, short term- and long term- effects, images, federal classifications and more.

SAMHSA: Substance Abuse & Mental Health Services Administration Provides info on the prevention of substance abuse, alcohol and drug addiction, treatment, and mental health services.

NCADD: National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence, Inc. Provides education, information, help, and hope to the public. It advocates prevention, intervention, and treatment through a nationwide network of affiliates.

NIAAA: National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism Provides current publications, research and news on alcohol addiction.

American Council on Alcoholism More helpful information on intervention, problems surrounding alcohol abuse, self-tests, and other resources.

ALCOHOL ADDICTION INTERACTIVE/BLOG SITES:
Demons in the Dark: Everything you always wanted to know about alcohol and alcoholism, but were afraid to ask.

TOBACCO:
CDC: Tobacco Facts Extensive information on smoking and the tobacco industry.

PAIN MANAGEMENT:
AAPM: The American Academy of Pain Medicine is the medical specialty society representing physicians practicing in the field of Pain Medicine.

ONLINE COMMUNITIES/SUPPORT:
Changing Lives Foundation Private Group (Facebook) A place for families and friends of a person struggling with alcohol or drug abuse/addiction—to post, discuss and help each other. This is a closed group where anyone can join—and safely post without fear of “the world” being able to see. Click on link, ask to join and someone will sign you in.

The Addict’s Mom: Sharing Without Shame A group focusing on the mothers of addicted children. The relationship between the mother and addicted child is unique; that does not diminish the experiences of other family members. Join one of their many online communities—The Addict’s Mom, The Addict, The Addict’s Dad, The Single Addict’s Mom.

FOB (Friends of Bill) A social network specifically designed for alcoholics and addicts. Connect with new friends from all over the world who are just like you. New, easy online instant chat!

In the Rooms The premier, most comprehensive online social network for the recovery community worldwide. For the 23 hours a day you’re not at a meeting. in the Rooms has many of the most popular 12-Step fellowships as groups for you to become a member of. In here you’ll find great discussions, great people, resources, and archives.

Faces and Voices of Recovery Dedicated to changing public perceptions of recovery, promoting effective public policy in Washington and in all 50 states, and demonstrating that recovery is working for millions of Americans.

SelfGrowth.com The #1 Self-Improvement Site on the internet. SelfGrowth.com is the most complete guide to information about Self -Improvement, Personal Growth and Self Help on the Internet. It is designed to be an organized directory, with articles and references to thousands of other Web Sites on the World Wide Web.

NUTRITION & FITNESS:
Nutrition Action The largest-circulation health newsletter in North America providing reliable information on nutrition and health.

Nutrition Info Dept. of Health and Human Services

Fitness Info Dept. of Health and Human Services

GENERAL SELF-HELP:
SelfHelpAndImprovements.com
Self improvement tips is an easy method to kick-start your individual development and to motivate yourself to greater levels of achievement and success.

RECOVERY RADIO:
Eye on Addiction Radio
Helping Families Fight Addiction. Denver’s first live call-in talk radio show devoted to providing help for families torn apart by alcohol or drug abuse; Eye on Addiction is a weekly talk radio, live call-in show brought to you by Changing Lives Foundation.

Recovery Now! A weekly radio program that discusses Alcoholism and Addiction recovery. Topics covered include: Causes, Symptoms, Intervention, Depression, Drug Therapies, 12-Step, Treatment Programs and much more. The format of the show is an informal roundtable discussion led by Ned Wicker.

Recovery Coast to Coast Two hours of engaging dialogue, news updates and interviews around the topics of addiction, treatment, research and recovery.

Prescription Addiction Radio The Prescription Addiction Radio Show is a challenge to America to discuss the culture in our country that has evolved into accepting the silent epidemic that has created a growing number of people who cannot get through their day without an addictive or psychologically mind altering drug.

BLOGS:
The official blog of: Changing Lives Foundation We are convinced that people can recover—and make dramatic changes in their lives.

Addiction Journal Addiction Journal is a compilation of thoughts, skills, and emotion to help other parents struggling with an addicted child. It is a work in progress, much like recovery.

Treatment Talk Sharing and Support for Addiction, Recovery and Treatment.

There is No Hero in Heroin Blog A place for anyone with a family member caught in the grip of Heroin Addiction. You are not alone.

Soaring Above Co-Addiction Helping your loved one get clean, while creating the life of your dreams.

Dad on Fire On fire about the impact of addiction and need for solutions. This blog is always interesting to read.

Sober Blogger’s Directory
Top 100 Sober Blogs. Make friends. Find support. Help others. Embrace recovery.

POEMS AND STORIES:
Addiction Poems about Family A collection of reader-submitted poems from real people about real-life situations.

FUN STUFF:
Runners for Recovery A running club for people in recovery and those whose lives have been impacted by addiction to alcohol and other drugs.

OneRecovery.com A friendly and feature-rich online recovery community for alcohol, drug and eating disorder addiction.

The Lois Wilson Story (Hallmark Hall of Fame) The first biography of the great American woman, wife of the man who co-founded Alcoholics Anonymous (AA)—a world-wide movement to save millions of families from the devastation of alcohol and drugs.

SELF-TESTS FOR YOURSELF AND OTHERS:
Tools to Assess Others:
Alcohol and Drug Addiction
Take this Alcohol and Drug Addiction Self-Test for yourself, or for someone you love.

Co-dependence
Take this Co-dependence Self-Test for yourself, or for someone you love.

Gambling Addiction
Take this Gambling Addiction Self-Test for yourself, or for someone you love.

Al-Anon Quiz Are you troubled by someone’s drinking?
The following questions, from Al-Anon Family Groups, are designed to help you decide whether or not you need Al-Anon.

Self-Assessment Tools:
Is AA for you?
Symptoms of alcoholism are summed up in 12 questions most A.A.s had to answer to identify themselves as alcoholics.

CRAFFT Quiz:
If you’re a teen (12-17 years old) concerned about your own drug and/or alcohol use.

Alcohol Screening:
How much is too much? If you’re an adult (18 or older) concerned about your drinking.
NEW!
MORE RESOURCES:

Low cost, No cost Alcohol and Drug Treatment Directory

Return from Resource Links for Families of Addicts and Alcoholics to Drug Addiction Help Now Home

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“www.GettingThemSober.com is one of the best websites on… recovery… out of hundreds of websites on that issue on the internet” – America Online (from the Jan/Feb issue of AOL’s magazine, www.health.com)

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Is it okay to smoke some weed

 

JoeHerzanekQ Is it okay for a recovering addict
to smoke pot?


A. No


This has also been referred to as the “marijuana maintenance plan.”
Regardless of what a person’s past drugs of choice were, smoking pot
during recovery is a very bad idea.

Many people who have tried this have ended up with one of two results:
the same lack of control and abuse problem with smoking pot, or a return to their drug of choice.
Drug users tend to make poor choices while under the influence
of any mind-altering drug. Good intentions fly out the window when
any use begins.

This is actually just an attempt to continue using something—
anything—rather than remain substance free. In order to set the record straight and make this simple, below are questions I am asked over and over, and I’ve included the answers I give over and over.
Our persistent attempts to find a loophole can be quite
humorous at times!

 

JoeHerzanekQ Is it okay to smoke some weed once
in a while?


A. No


 

JoeHerzanekQ If I was a heroin addict and I quit that drug
completely, is it okay to just smoke some weed?


A. No



 

JoeHerzanekQ If I’m a recovering alcoholic, is it okay to
smoke some weed?


A. No


 

JoeHerzanekQ I’m in recovery, but since weed is found to
grow naturally in many places, is it okay
to just smoke weed?


A. No


 

JoeHerzanek

Q Since weed is not really a drug, is it okay to
smoke some weed?


A. No


 

JoeHerzanekQ I heard about a guy in recovery that smokes
weed. Do you think I might be able to?


A. No


 

JoeHerzanekQ There is an organization called NORMAL.
If a group like this is able to get marijuana legalized,
do you think I could just smoke weed?

A. No


 

JoeHerzanekQ I’ve heard about smoking “medical marijuana” for people
with health problems. What’s up with this?


A. This is one really bad idea.

 

Supposedly for pain relief, it is now possible to get a medical marijuana
(MM) card. The typical MM card-holder is a twenty-three-year-old
male. Even if it were true that we have high numbers of young males
with chronic pain—smoking marijuana for “medical reasons” is still a
mistake. First of all, it is very easy to just extract the active ingredient,
THC, and use it in pill-form. Why inhale the smoke into the lungs, other
than to get the quicker rush, or “high” the drug produces?

Secondly, this is one more way of throwing our hands up in the air and saying
“People are just going to get stoned and there’s nothing we can do about it.”

Do we, as a nation, want to make it easier for young people to get stoned? Personaly, I don’t think so. Lastly, marijuana addiction is number three on the list of reasons people seek treatment. The first is alcohol, second is for
opiates (pain meds) and then marijuana. After these three, come cocaine, and methamphetamine.

“We owe it to the people we serve to speak out
about the unintended consequences legalization (of
marijuana) would have and the toll it would take on the
health and safety of our communities.”
“Over the course of my career, from St. Petersburg
to Seattle, I learned a lot about the damage drug abuse
does to the fabric of our society—and about the terrible
toll it takes on individuals, families and communities
across this country,” Kerlikowske told his former peers.
“I’ll never forget the rage and despair I felt when I
worked undercover and I saw a drug dealer take a hit of
marijuana—and then blow the smoke in the face of his toddler.”

~Gil Kerlikowske, Director, Office of National Drug Control Policy
(comments from a speech given at the International Conference of Chiefs of Police Annual Convention, October 23, 2009).

 

Why Don't They Just Quit? What families and friends need to know about addiction and recovery." by Joe HerzanekThis “Q & A with Joe” is excerpted from Part 5 of “Why Don’t They Just Quit? What families and friends need to know about addiction and recovery.”

 

NEED HELP NOW?
Affordable Phone Counseling for Families Dealing with Substance Abuse

MORE ASK JOE:
>How can I know if my addicted friend or loved one is telling the truth?

>”I need help because I’m not able to deal with my live-in Fiance’s need to get drunk every night.”

>Should my husband “back off?”

Sign up for our Free Changing Lives E-Newsletter!

okay for recovering addict to smoke pot okay to smoke pot okay for recovering addict to smoke pot
okay to smoke pot okay to smoke weed

 

 

February 16, 2012 by jherzanek | 21 comments

alcoholic or heavy user?

 

JoeHerzanekQ How can I tell if someone is an addict/alcoholic or just a heavy user?


A. It is almost impossible to tell when someone has crossed
this line.

 

What you will be able to see, however, are the signs of dependency.
Sometimes these signs will be subtle and other times they’ll be more
obvious.

Here are a few questions regarding behavioral signs that may
signal dependency:
• Has this person’s attitude changed?
• Are they using daily?
• Are they unable to control how much they are using?
• Are they defensive about their using?

• Has work or school performance declined?
• How long has this persisted? Do they try to hide their use?
• Have they lost interest in people or activities that were once
important to them?

Beyond these, there may be more obvious signs such as legal problems,
DUIs, or frequent job changes. Seeking advice from a professional
is always a good idea. You may also take a self-test. It you’re
concerned about this person, you probably know him or her fairly well.
Take the self-test for alcoholism/drug addiction found on our Changing Lives Foundation website and answer as if you were your friend or loved one. See how well you score.

 

Why Don't They Just Quit? What families and friends need to know about addiction and recovery." by Joe HerzanekThis “Q & A with Joe” is excerpted from Part 5 of “Why Don’t They Just Quit? What families and friends need to know about addiction and recovery.”

 

NEED HELP NOW?
Affordable Phone Counseling for Families Dealing with Substance Abuse

MORE ASK JOE:
>How can I know if my addicted friend or loved one is telling the truth?

>”I need help because I’m not able to deal with my live-in Fiance’s need to get drunk every night.”

>Should my husband “back off?”

Sign up for our Free Changing Lives E-Newsletter!

addict/alcoholic or heavy user alcoholic or heavy user addict or heavy user

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Joe Herzanek, Author, Addiction Counselor and Interventionist

> Chaplain Joe Herzanek, Author, Addiction Counselor

 

 

Rock Bottom, Raising the Bottom
or Tough Love?

After speaking to and emailing hundreds of parents, spouses and other family members, I know this is a lot easier said, than done. Raising the bottom is especially difficult for mothers and is one of the reasons I wrote the book Why Don’t They JUST QUIT? — to get the message to as many as possible.

Exactly what do I mean by “raising the bottom”? This whole idea of “hitting bottom” is out of date. Some people will wait years–even decades–for their friend to reach this mythical point in their alcohol and drug use. But why wait for them to “hit bottom”? Why not help them by raising their bottom? There are ways to encourage someone to reach for help much earlier. In doing so, we can avoid a lot of unnecessary pain and heartache and maybe even save their life. For some people, hitting bottom will be six feet underground.

So does everyone have to hit rock bottom? I would say no. Tough love can prevent a substance abuser from prolonging their usage. There are loving ways to refuse to rescue someone that in the long run will help him or her to choose recovery. Loving means doing the right thing to help. This can take all of our strength and energy at times. “We all hate to see someone suffer even when the suffering is a consequence of their bad choices. This approach, or some form of it, is something you might consider: Raise the bottom. Whether it is a teenage son or daughter, a spouse, boyfriend, aunt or uncle, the same principles can apply. A few nights in jail could be the best thing that ever happens to them. The next time this person you care about appeals to you to get them out of a bind (loan them money, pay their electric bill, buy them gas, pay for a lawyer), think twice. You just might be prolonging their disease and robbing them of the natural consequences that they need to experience in order to seek help and begin to connect the dots.

I receive a lot of mail from family members who are searching for “Al-anon type” answers and information. Here’s a typical email and my response (I’ve changed the name and some of the details to protect the identity of this woman).

Dear Joe,
I have just ordered Why Don’t They JUST QUIT? as my last resort to get off the emotional rollercoaster my alcoholic husband has put me on! He has been an alcoholic since he was a teenager. It’s like living with Jekyl & Hyde! The physical & emotional rollercoaster is killing me. He has been incarcerated about 4 times and was in many different programs for alcohol, at least 5 or 6. He drives while drinking, and gambles when he drinks. I could go on forever. I constantly walk on eggshells and don’t know how much more I can handle. This book is my last resort before I suffer a mental breakdown.

Thanks Joe,
Sarah

Hi Sarah,
Thanks for your email. Sorry to hear about your current struggle. Your life does not have to be this way! The book will definitely help and give you some insights on the addiction problem. The difficult part will be sticking with the tough love that is necessary to motivate your husband to begin recovery. You can do it and so can he.

I don’t know your entire situation, but the number one issue must be dealt with, and that is HIS alcohol and or drug use.

Keep that in mind. You didn’t cause this problem and you can’t control or cure it. What you can do is confront it and perhaps give ultimatums. You can force him to see the light or feel the heat.

At some point he needs to choose which relationship is the most important–his relationship with you or his relationship with alcohol. Let him know there is a high cost to continue his current way of living. The pain of consequences is often the best teacher.

Hang in there.
Joe

 

ASK JOE:
>Son needs $75 for drug dealer of he’ll be “killed for sure.”

>”I need help because I’m not able to deal with my live-in Fiance’s need to get drunk every night.”

>Should my husband “back off?”

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RESOURCES:
Addiction Recovery Resources for Families of Substance Abusers, Addicts and Alcoholics

Why Don't They Just Quit? by Joe Herzanek
Why Don’t They Just Quit? What families and friends need to know about addiction and recovery.

> Paperback

> Audio Book CD, MP3 (NEW!)

> Kindle

> Audible Audio Download  (LISTEN TO 4 MIN. SAMPLE)

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TRAPpED: Memoirs of an EX-METH addict and her RECOVERY out of the insanity of it all

At the age of 14, a girl barely cognizant of responsibility, safety or survival, Lori L. Stephens was thrown out into the street by her mother. This would be the beginning of a life no one deserves to endure, ever.

With nowhere to go, confused and frightened beyond comprehension, she settled in inside of a small washroom of a condo complex. Curled up as small as she could make herself, she lay abandoned, with only her pillow case filled with a few clothes. What happened next can only be adequately described in the pages within, and this was only the beginning.

Through her struggle to stay alive in a world she barely understood, with no lessons about life or warnings, with non-existent parents from a broken home, without support and encouragement or life experiences that might help in understanding right from wrong, good from bad, safety from danger, this young girl met adversity headlong, with no recourse at her disposal.

The memoirs of the next 30 years of her life of drug abuse, with METHAMPHETAMINES as her mainstay, physical violence, rape, conflict with the Law…, are described profoundly in this book. Also, the courage, the will to stay alive, the guts to persevere through an impossible road out of the toughest trap from which one might ever have to escape, Lori Stephens overcomes impossible adversity.

And in result, this woman’s strength to overcome “and her heroism to help others do the same can only inspire and encourage every person in their daily lives. This is something to be shared and cheered about, because we all win when someone beats impossible odds. Through their examples, we, ourselves, become fortified and empowered to overcome; we become more willing to help; we become more excited about living life!

This woman’s story will amaze you. It will make you realize so many things about yourself. And it will likely be something that you carry with you, for inspiration, for the rest of your life.

Click here to read more about this author and order

* Have you “tried everything?” To learn about individual counseling with Joe Herzanek (in person or by phone) click here.

 

EX-METH addict meth memoirs EX-METH addict meth memoirs EX-METH addict meth memoirs

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Pain Meds Cause More PainPain Meds Cause More Pain! The new silent epidemic.

This article excerpted from the award-winning book “Why Don’t They Just Quit? What families and friends need to know about addiction and recovery.” by Joe Herzanek

Technology is wonderful—up to a point. The medical and pharmaceutical industries have made huge advances to help those suffering from all sorts of diseases. Most of these advances are genuine lifesavers.

Americans are enjoying longer and higher quality lives—so much so, that we have come to expect many things as normal (diseases cured, symptoms gone and less pain for those suffering the debilitating affects of certain health problems).

Much Too Popular
One class of drugs—opiate painkillers, has become much too popular. These meds will not only relieve physical pain but will also give the user a pleasant euphoric effect at the same time. For a significant and growing number of people this euphoric state of mind is becoming more and more difficult to let go of (similar to the popularity of Valium in the 70′s—which by the way, has been recently increasing as well).

So how and why is this happening? How do pain meds cause even more pain? Let me start by saying that these drugs are very necessary for genuine pain—such as pain experienced after a surgery, broken bones, dental work and more. When used as prescribed, for short periods of time these drugs make life manageable. In some very rare cases they may be appropriate for extended periods of time—especially when a person has a terminal disease. A very small percentage of people fall into this category. Thank God for these medications.

The majority of people who take these medications do not fall in this group. Here is where the problem starts. Rarely does anyone start out to become dependent on opiate pain meds. It happens slowly without being noticed. This is an insidious process. Usually, there comes a time when a person’s physical pain is gone. With regular use of painkilling drugs, the central nervous system has come to expect the drug and the sedative affect it produces—as normal.

Withdrawal
When a person stops using the drug, the body revolts. This is called withdrawal. It’s normal. Much less extreme, but nonetheless similar, a heavy coffee drinker who suddenly quits drinking coffee altogether will experience headaches for a few days. This is because their central nervous system has become accustomed to regular jolts of caffeine throughout the day. Withdrawal from caffeine is usually short-lived and not too difficult. Stopping opiate pain meds is similar, but much, much more intense. The withdrawal symptoms are often very painful—so much so that the person will start to think that their pain is not really gone and they must get and take more pain meds.

A Vicious Cycle
Not only is the body expecting this drug, but a person who is taking pain medication is also building a tolerance to it. Their body is requiring more, sometimes lots more—to feel better. This is a vicious cycle that feeds on itself and only gets worse over time. The person taking theses drugs will also become much more sensitive to all pain—as the normal ability to handle mild pain with over-the-counter medications is now diminished.

I’ve recently watched this problem arise close to home, as a family member needed surgery. He had been regularly taking large amounts of pain meds for back pain. While in the hospital for knee-replacement surgery, he found that he required a much larger dosage of pain meds than a normal person would need. After he was given the maximum safe dosage—excruciating pain still persisted. One feels helpless in these situations.

To ensure that this doesn’t happen, pain meds really should only be used when truly needed. Otherwise, when the time comes that a person genuinely needs them—these pain-relieving drugs may not work at all.

How large is this problem really? In 2007 there were a total of 3.7 billion prescriptions written in the United States. 182 million were for pain meds*! I have double-checked these numbers because I thought they couldn’t be correct. Pain meds are second only to prescriptions written for lowering cholesterol (192 million prescriptions). Anti-depressant prescriptions came in third with 158 million.

If you subtract people aged 21 and under from these numbers—that leaves 230 million adults. According to these calculations, over 15 million people are taking opiate pain medications every day. This is 5% of the entire adult population.

Do all these people need opiate pain medication every day? The only way to know for sure is to quit, go through withdrawal and see how you feel after a few months—drug-free. More and more people are unwilling to go through this process. Today, addiction to opiate pain medications is one of the main reasons people are checking into rehab centers.

So how does one avoid becoming dependant on pain medications? And once a person has become dependant on them, how do they learn to safely quit?

Return from Pain Meds Cause More Pain! The new silent epidemic to Drug Addiction Help Now Home

RELATED ARTICLES:
Opiate Pain Meds: Avoiding Opiate Prescription Drug Addiction in Recovery

Read more about this topic—chapter 27, Why Don’t They JUST QUIT?

Effects of Addiction


* IMS Health Services (2007 Research Statistics)

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February 12, 2012 by jherzanek | 6 comments

How can I tell if they are telling the truth?

 

JoeHerzanekQ How can I know if my addicted friend or
loved one is telling me the truth?


A. Most of the time, you can’t.

 

There is no hard and fast test for honesty in a person—especially a substance abuser. Don’t be surprised or terribly hurt if and when a recovering
person fails to tell you the truth. I have done this myself, and seen it
during my interactions with the men and women I’ve counseled over the
years (particularly those in the jails and prisons). The thought life of the
chemically dependent person is all about the drug—24/7/365.

When I was using drugs, I planned my days around getting high.
When someone asked me what I’d been doing, where I was going, where
I’d been, why I needed money, or when I would be back, I just made
things up. Honesty would only have caused more problems for me. My
attitude was, I’ll tell you whatever I need to say to get you off my back.
This is one reason recovery is difficult at first, since it means being
honest for the first time in a long time.

 

This “Q & A with Joe” is excerpted from Part 5 of “Why Don’t They Just Quit? What families and friends need to know about addiction and recovery.”

RESOURCES:

Addiction Recovery Resources for Families of Substance Abusers, Addicts and Alcoholics

Why Don't They Just Quit? by Joe Herzanek
Why Don’t They Just Quit? What families and friends need to know about addiction and recovery.

> Paperback

> Audio Book CD, MP3 (NEW!)

> Kindle

> Audible Audio Download  (LISTEN TO 4 MIN. SAMPLE)

MORE ASK JOE:
>Son needs $75 for drug dealer of he’ll be “killed for sure.”

>”I need help because I’m not able to deal with my live-in Fiance’s need to get drunk every night.”

>Should my husband “back off?”

Sign up for our Free Changing Lives E-Newsletter!

RETURN:
>From “How to know if my addicted loved one is telling the truth?” to Changing Lives Foundation Blog Home

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Eye on Addiction Radio
Show #3

Eye on Addiction Radio
630 KHOW “Denver’s Talk Station”

 

Love First Intervention:
How Do I Intervene?

Guest: Jeff Jay
Interventionist and co-author of, love first

Jeff Jay, Love First

• Do interventions work?
• What are some different ways of intervening?
• What to do when the addict finds out about the intervention in advance?
(The answer may surprise you).

Joe and Jeff discuss different methods for intervening and the ways family can prepare for a successful intervention and what to do when the addict finds out about the intervention in advance. Listen to this one-hour show, including questions from listeners.

Listen Now

LISTEN NOW

Joe Herzanek and Jeff Jay
discuss these questions, answer calls and more.


Love First Website

Visit the Love First all-new website


 

 

 

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RELATED:
> Intervention: The Solution for Families Held Hostage by Alcohol and Substance Abuse
> Interventions: Believe it or not, you do them all the time
> Baby Boomers and Older Adults (excerpted from the book Love First)

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