Ask Joe: “I need help because I’m not able to deal with my live-in fiance’s need to get drunk every night”

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Joe HerzanekAsk Joe:
“I need help because I’m not able to deal with my live-in fiance’s need to get drunk every night”

I just now received this email/question asking for guidance.

Dear Joe,
I came across your site but I don’t have the money to buy a book or anything. I need help because I’m not able to deal with my live-in fiance’s need to get drunk every night. I’m not comfortable with it.

He says I need counseling to just deal with it because lots of people drink every night. He comes up with bizarre stuff to justify his drinking. Like he’s an Aquarius so he has to drink because . . . (Read the entire entry and Joe’s simple answer)

 

 

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>Chronic Pain Management & Pain Pill Addiction: What to do?

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>”I need help because I’m not able to deal with my live-in Fiance’s need to get drunk every night.”

>Should my husband “back off?”

>Gambling vs. Drug Addiction? What is your opinion?

>How can I tell if someone is an addict/alcoholic or just a heavy user?

>What is Methadone? What is Harm Reduction?

 

RELATED:

> Self-Tests: Alcohol and Drug Addiction

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RESOURCES:

Addiction Recovery Resources for Families of Substance Abusers, Addicts and Alcoholics

Why Don't They Just Quit? by Joe Herzanek
Why Don’t They Just Quit? What families and friends need to know about addiction and recovery.

> Paperback

> Audio Book CD, MP3 (NEW!)

> Kindle

> Audible Audio Download  (LISTEN TO 4 MIN. SAMPLE)

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6 thoughts on “Ask Joe: “I need help because I’m not able to deal with my live-in fiance’s need to get drunk every night”

  1. Pingback: Help an Addict by "Raising their Bottom" | Changing Lives Foundation Blog

  2. Joe

    Hi Susan,

    I’m glad your son went to rehab. It’s now VERY IMPORTANT that he follow-up with lots of 12 Step groups. I don’t know of any better way to maintain long term sobriety.

    Inhalant use is perhaps the worst when it comes to damaging the brain. If continued for a long period of time they will do irreparable brain damage. Don’t put up with it!
    Joe

  3. Susan Tretta

    I finished your book, Why don’t they just quit?” and found it to be very interesting. easy to read. My son completed rehab in February this year and is now in a recovery house since then . He is an alcoholic and drug user. He was using an inhalant and I was wondering about this. Did not read anything about this in your book. He did have 4 car accidents in a 3 month period after using inhalants in the car. How dangerous are they? how long in the system?

  4. Pingback: Do you have to stop seeing all your old friends in order to recover? | Changing Lives Foundation Blog

  5. connie49

    It’s just going to get worse and he will bring you down to his level. He is going to blame you for everything especially his drinking. He doesn’t want to except his own actions and ad-mitt he is an alcoholic, So it’s much easier manipulating you so you will think it’s all your fault for the messier house or his socks has a hole in it, my ex went out and pulled an all nigher all because I brought the kids home a cat. You see they will not except their life and they don’t want you to point it out to them. My mother told me that if I stayed, I would eventually be brought down to his level and I didn’t want to do that. Also. a drunk and a sober person don’t get along very well. I can’t stand a drunk and if he is a crying drunk I have no pity on them at all. I can’t stand a crying drunk. It is good that you found out about him before you married him, they don’t usually change until they are in prison or knocking on death’s door.

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